Where is God?

I have pondered this question more times than I care to admit. I find myself trapped in a mental state of purgatory that is really "fucking" with me and I don't know how to deal with it. Religion teaches us to have faith...which is belief without proof. Education teaches us to rely on facts/proof. The more educated I get, the more I lose faith. 

History is written by the victor and the victors seldom have any morals in their nature (that's probably why they won).  So I  don't believe in any document written by "victors".... which is any document or book that hasn't been burned.

Which brings me to my original question....."Where is God?"

I'm not saying I'm an atheist, I'm not saying I'm a believer.....I am saying that I know nothing....like John Snow.  If you don't understand the reference then you should probably stop reading this blog (***there will be many references in the future FYI***)

I have come to the conclusion that we (humans) are nothing more than ants in a science project and I can't think of a reason that "god" would give any fuck care about any, specific one of us. 

Are we to believe a deity that created all of universe, is concerned whether or not we got a promotion, demotion, or food in our belly's? 

Doubtful...Unlikely......Wait, WTF, that doesn't make any fucking sense, now that I say it out loud.  Please refer to my initial title and let me know if you can help me on my spiritual journey.